I love cake. Cake is wonderful. But it is too easy to get caught up in the idea of cake. When you compare the data, it is clear that pie is a better choice.
1. Ability of enjoyment to be sustained over time
The first few mouthfuls of cake are almost magical, but as eating continues, enjoyment drops off precipitously. The enjoyment curve for pie appears to be much more stable over time.
2. Unequal frosting distribution is a problem
Pie exhibits much greater homogeneity than cake. In cake, the highest concentration of awesomeness is found in the frosting. The act of decorating a cake can polarize it and cause a dangerously uneven distribution of frosting, leading to discord and animosity during serving time.
3. Pie appears to contain a greater relative volume of enjoyable substances.
4. Pie is more scientifically versatile:
5. Pie is relevant in a greater variety of situations:
Cake is appropriate in a very limited number of situations, whereas almost any day is a great day to have pie.
6. Cake has much more severe, longer lasting consequences than pie:
UPDATE: It's too early to tell whether this hybridization is the best idea ever or just dangerous and foolish:
Most likely it will either solve all the problems in the world or end humanity in a hyperglycemic blaze of glory.
we HAVE a cake/pie hybrid in the UK. it's called a Mr Kipling Bakewell Tars. it's pastry case, jam, cakey-stuff, frosting and a cherry.
ReplyDeleteI L-O-V-E pie! I made pie for pi day and everyone was so happy to see my special apple pie on the table. If you'd like to take a look it's here, http://createdbydiane.blogspot.com/2010/03/today-is-pi-day.htmlI'm following and look forward to seeing more of you blog.
ReplyDeleteWell you started this off with a lie. You don't love cake. In fact, you used this whole post to complain about cake. Plus there is a picture that shows apparently the only thing you like about cake is frosting. Plus, you also appear to not like the crust of pie. You don't appear to be a reliable source for cake/pie comparisons.
ReplyDeleteWhile I prefer pie to cake, I must point out that there are several kinds of cake, some more delicious than others, and various shapes, sizes and indeed basic designs. In essence, cake is more versatile, both for good and for bad.
ReplyDeleteI just ate ice cream cake inside a pie crust. WHERE IS YOUR GOD NOW?
ReplyDeleteI followed over from A Bride's Brain.FUNNIEST SHIT EVER. That bit about the frosting rose made me snort. Best post I've seen in ages!
ReplyDeleteYay finally scientific proof that pie is better! Cool charts, thanks for posting!
ReplyDeleteYou forgot another important point. Pie can also be meat!Chicken Pie, Steak Pie, Pork Pie! Whoever heard of a meat cake?
ReplyDeleteFucking brilliant. This totally made my morning. +Jessie
ReplyDeleteFlawless explanation of unequal frosting distribution. I think I love you.
ReplyDeleteyou obviously eat all the wrong cake, have you ever been to a place called Europe, you can't even find pie there because it's so, what's the word, suckie in comparison. American cake is a disservice to the word and all cake eaters, the only thing it is good for is food fights, which I will admit pies are better for, but then there is the issue that you have to launch whole pies and not pieces, so that's debatable depending on how much ammo you need.
ReplyDeleteHang on - there is a clear lack of extrapolation here. Why doesn't a cake chart make any sense? It's the same principle - area of the relevant coloured part versus area of the whole cake. It's even better for text wrapping, in scientific documents because of its linearity.Also - cupcakes are uniform and homogenous, and cakes make statements! The inhomogeneity of cakes lends itself to baking them of different shapes and sizes - to create cake castles etc. etc. They're versatile in terms of baker creativity (may not be culinary creativity)A cake is nearly always the chosen dessert compared to a sweet, throat dehydrating mince pie. Chocolate chips inside the cake make the cornucopious enjoyment last nearly as long as that of pie. I still agree that pie is a lot better nutritionally and in terms of variety of flavours and ingredients though.
ReplyDeletelove your blogs on Scientific, I really liked your review. Nice information! Your content unique and meaningful.Thanks
ReplyDeleteI just thought you should know that a few years ago, a radio station in my home town (which is really a city, but home city sounds odd), had a whole campaign dedicated to pie. I bought a t-shirt that said "Enjoy Pie Again!". I can't find a picture of it, though :(
ReplyDeleteIt was perhaps a mistake to read this while eating. Because I nearly choked on an orange when I saw the "cake chart". Well done.
ReplyDeleteMy fiancé is having Groom's Pie at our wedding instead of Groom's Cake.
ReplyDeleteAwesome! This has caused me to think as to how to categorize chocolate dipped sandwich cookies. Hmmmm...Nope. Pie still wins.
ReplyDeletePie's biggest advantage is its flexibility. Cake is cake -- essentially a buttery, small-crumb sweet bread. I'd wager that 95% of cakes are in one of two flavors -- vanilla and chocolate, and the icing is similarly limited. Pie, however, can be sweet, sour, or savory. It can be a tart, a quiche, a cheesecake (which is really a custard pie), or even a pizza pie! Even if we restrict pies to dessert pies, they can be lemon, cherry, apple, blueberry, blackberry, pecan, coconut, peanut butter... almost anything (strangely barring grape and most citrus).The cake's advantage is artistic. There are no seven-tiered wedding pies. There are no pie decorating contests. Cakes can be whimsical, cakes can be awe-inspiring, cakes can be clever, cakes can be beautiful, cakes can be surprising. 99.9% of pies are round. Just round. Small and round. Pies are for eating, period.Pies are also more likely to suck than cakes, because they take more skill. A great pie is better than a great cake, but there are fewer great pies. If your mom makes a great crust, or knows how to make a proper filling (or, be still my heart, BOTH!), then you are, no doubt, a pie fanatic. However, if your mother-in-law is like mine, then you've had to choke down a lot of bad, cardboard-crust, over-sweet, gloppy pies with a fake "MMMMMmmmmmm!" And that stinks. Cake, the worst that happens is it gets a bit dry.So, cake or pie? Me, I don't know. Then again, if pie v. cake was an easy question, then philosophers wouldn't have spent so much time on it.
ReplyDeleteBacon pie is proof that the flying spaghetti monster (PBUH) loves us and wants us to be happy.
ReplyDeleteI hate to totally disagree. But, I totally disagree. This might stem from the fact that I hate icing (unless it's cream cheese) and that the crust is my FAVE part of the pie. But, I think we both agree that cake and pie are both amazing.And I make an awesome wild blueberry pie. Mmmm.
ReplyDeleteCheesecake is really pie.So pie > cake.End.
ReplyDeleteI laughed, I cried, it became a part of me.Brava. Brava!
ReplyDeleteI stumbled across your blog today, and i have been reading for hours; thinking YOU ARE JUST LIKE ME! HOW CAN YOU BE IN MY HEAD? And then... this.I am sorry... but cake rules. Cake is my life. It is my job and my obsession. Cake is so much more than you give it credit for!Pie is lovely, but it's no cake.
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